All Entries in the "Soccer" Category
World Cup Update
Sports fans across the North American continent took to the streets in sack cloth and ashes…
Report: Several US Soccer Fans Stranded After Bandwagon Service Halted
A news source out of Albuquerque is reporting that about a dozen or so, fair weather US soccer fans have been sighted roaming through a barren wasteland, near Bluewater, NM, today. The quad-annual fans had boarded a Greyhound sponsored bandwagon in NJ, which was scheduled to sweep across the country while watching all US World [...]
USA Fans Give Back; Goodwill Donations Coming In Bundles
Goodwill continues to gather donations from USA fans after the teams lose to Ghana.
FIFA Announces Changes to Speed up Play
By Gina Hagler The head of FIFA told reporters today that some changes are in store for upcoming games. The changes are designed to speed up the rate of play and cut down on time taken for rulings. To do this, they’ll codify practices already in place on an informal level. “For one thing,” he [...]
FIFA to Switch to Steel Toe Boots to Boost Ratings
Taking inspiration from U2’s World Cup theme song, “Get Your Boots On”, FIFA officials have decided that players will be required to wear steel toe boots in the Knockout Round. An official was quoted, “We’re tired of everyone bitchin’ about how football, or soccer, whatever, isn’t a contact sport and how the players are pansies, [...]
US Victory Sparks Pizza Parties Nationwide
Their parents never said anything about taking pizza from strangers. In Pretoria, South Africa, at just about lunchtime EST in America, Landon Donovan scored the most storied and dramatic goal in US soccer history to date, as it lifted the US over Algeria and into the Knockout Round of the 2010 World Cup. Meanwhile, back [...]
Photo of the Day
Italy’s soccer team prepares for Slovakia. A behind the scenes look at their practice routine.
Wednesday: Are You Ready USA Fans?
Stand behind your country, even if you don’t care for the sport. Fans of Team USA are getting ready for the match-up verses Algeria that kicks off at 10a.m.
Photo of the Day
New cell phone advertisement based from the World Cup
Hinkle-Horn Honkers Go Vuvuzela
By Gina Hagler This news just in from the town of Mercedd, The Hinkle-Horn Honkers are tucked into bed. But tomorrow they’ll rise and trade in their horns. We know this because leader Freddy has sworn, “Tomorrow we’ll march off, Vuvuzela in hand. For the sound of a lifetime. It will be grand. You’ll hear [...]
Have it Uruguay
Uruguay defeated World Cup host South Africa today 3:0, making sports reporters around the United States giddy with excitement. They are now able to use catchy headlines like It’s Uruguay or the Highway, Time to Find Uruguay Home and Have it Uruguay. ESPN has undoubtedly already used all three in the same sentence.
Baltimore’s “Hugest” Soccer Fan Buys Jersey, Changes Allegiance
BALTIMORE, MD–After Team USA’s 1-1 draw vs. England, on Saturday, Baltimore’s soccer landscape suddenly shifted, possibly for the worse. Dave McGraw, 33, of Fells Point, Baltimore’s self-proclaimed “hugest” soccer fan (although he calls it football, displaying that he is a proper fan) went online and purchased a Jozy Altidore jersey off Ebay. McGraw wished to [...]
Germany Scores Too Many Goals
The highly ranked German team came out to play for their first game of the 2010 World Cup with a 4-0 win, but some aren’t pleased after this exciting victory.
“Fans” Pretend to Care About Soccer Again
The World Cup is back again, prompting people to actually pretend they like soccer again.