Knicks Get Third Person From Nuggets in Melo Trade

The New York Knicks have acquired third person from the Denver Nuggets in the trade that brought Carmelo Anthony and Chauncey Billups to the Big Apple.

“Playing in New York for the Knicks is something Carmelo Anthony has always dreamed of,” said Anthony, referring to himself in third person.

While still in Denver dealing with trade rumors swirling to tornado levels before the NBA All-Star break, Anthony praised himself, though technically not in the third-person tense, by saying “I take my hat off to myself for dealing with all this stuff that’s going on and still be able to go out there and play at the high level that I can play at. I really don’t think an average person can walk in my shoes. I don’t think that.”

At press time, we couldn’t confirm if he had taken off a Nuggets hat, a Knicks hat, or just some other unrelated hat, or whether he made the gesture in a mirror. In fact, we’re still not sure how someone could take their hat off to themselves or if Anthony is the first person (pardon the pun) to ever take his hat off to himself. He does make a good point about the average person’s ability to walk in his shoes: the average man wears a size 10 shoe, while Anthony’s shoes are likely much, much bigger than that, as he stands at 6 feet 8 inches, certainly a lot taller than the average person.

Now that he’s in New York, Anthony finally gives the Knicks their first true superstar scorer who talks about himself in third person since Stephon Marbury. Former NBA sharpshooter Chuck Person was unavailable for comment.

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